Spam Onslaught!

Over the course of May 9, 2017, Southern Boulevard was attacked by spam blogs. They commented on pictures and posts all around SB. If it weren’t for the Askimet Spam filter, they could’ve slipped through!

The Spam Onslaught of 2017 began at 8:02 am and ended at 3:13 pm, with a few advance scouts making a light attacks at 10:32 and 3:20 am respectively in the last days of April leading up to the attack.


Since Southern Boulevard believes in sportsmanship, here are some of the fine spammers that tried (and failed) to appear on its pages:

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Hi Nate. Please don’t.

This is the link from which one of the intruders seems to originate. Not much to say about this one. Just, uh, here it is.

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This spambot took a slightly more tactful approach, seeking to infiltrate with charm and guile. Despite utilization of a smiley face and what appears to be an Agatha Christie namedrop, this comment will not be appearing on Southern Boulevard.

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Our spirited friend below says, “Og leg er forbanna stolt av det!!!!!” Is this a battlecry? A rallying shout to spur on the attack? Google Translate suggests that this is in fact Norwegian meaning, “And play is damn proud of it.”

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On Southern Boulevard’s About page, someone has given it the ok rating of 500 points. Welcome, French friend! Or should I say, mon ami?

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This Spam from the alleged “Delia” really makes a splash. I’m touched, Delia of fxrnilv.com, I really am. Delia went out of his/her way to exclaim that “Your postnig lays bare the truth” in response to the masterpiece of American literature that is “Happy National Pomegranate Month,” a post that had only the loftiest of intentions and clearly, at least for Delia, has fulfilled them.

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I blushed at this one ;). Lawanda from jhbnyz.com says, “You cranium must be prconttieg some very valuable brains,” and this in response to “CT Boys in the Big Apple.” Lawanda must not know that many CT Boys.

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Roxie feels “feeelb” in comparison to a sarcastic shopping guide. Roxie, never give up.

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Somehow this spammer found their answer to the challenging query: What does your Halloween Costume say about you?

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This is the biggest, meatiest tank of the lot. This chunk of spam flew in out of cyberspace looking to tear things up. It failed, but it is a masterpiece of utterly distorted information that I’d like to share.

Funny, I went to buy it too this week for me and himself because we are sick too, and after presenting ID my pharmacist asked me if I wanted 12, 24,48, or the 96 count. Here they swipe your driver’s license though, they’ve gotten away from the largely ceremonial #62book&18218; you used to have to sign. I can’t complain, though; the woman in the other line was being told that her insurance company rejected her doctor’s ‘brand medically necessary’ notation on her prescription because whatever she was trying to get filled costs $1400. A month.Â

The poignant paragraph ends with “A month.” as if this is an afterthought…as if to say, these are real people with a real problem.

Another spammer tried to butter me up with “Furrealz? That’s masloleurvy good to know.”

Finally, the spam comment I’ve been waiting for. This spammer raises an excellent point: is there a generational divide in terms of &##820;friends&82221; on the web? What about the benefits of face-to-face conversation?

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Foiled again, wily spammers. Foiled again.


 

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