1. If you have a cell phone made past 1998, you can do it.
2. Unlike a phone call, lets you communicate with several people at the same time.
3. You can now send “emojis” to add some personalization to your texts.
1. Hours spent hunched over your phone gives you a curved spine.
2. Unlike a phone call, lets you communicate with several people at the same time, resulting in uncomfortable moments where people send each other something meant for a different person (just think about that for a second).
3. Lots of people text things that should be said in person rather than saved forever in an electronic format anyone in the world who has the tenacity can read.
4. It’s more practical to abbreviate words, resulting in unreadable messages.
5. In some cases, phones autocorrect abbreviations. This results in worse spelling grades for kids, and heinous misunderstandings.
6. Emojis can be sent to people who want to get things done.
7. It’s possible to send a “read receipt” so someone knows that you’ve read a text. From what one guy told me in high school, this can be used to annoy a person annoying you in an insane fashion.
8. People other than me hate reading long texts. I like sending them because I don’t feel like breaking it into separate ones. This is a problem.
9. Sarcasm often does not translate in texts without the use of emojis. I do not use emojis most of the time, and thus cannot be sarcastic most of the time in text or in person, resulting in all my sarcasm ending up here.
10. Phones lead to distracted driving/walking because they go off right when someone texts you unless your phone is silenced, in which case you don’t get back to them until four hours later.
11. Speaking of which, people who would once wait patiently for things to arrive in the mail now throw little hissy fits when someone takes more than five seconds to respond.
12. Your hands cramp when having a fast, sudden conversation with a best friend you haven’t seen in a long time, leading to a Pavlov’s dog association of that friend with pain, thus leading to this equation:
IF Friend = prolonged texting, AND prolonged texting = pain/distraction, THEN Friend = pain/distraction.
In some ways, it’s way better than the prickling silence, answering machines, and breathing sounds of a phone call.